Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Precariously Perched

A construction worker working next door on a Sunday (in all probability an immigrant), that too without any safety gear. I'd hear the songs of Aashiqui coming from a phone placed somewhere inside the building. It made clicking these pictures more pleasurable.

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Bonus


While looking for the link of Aashiqui I discovered that my favourite song from the film Dheere Dheere Se is inspired by Joyce Sims' Come into My Life, which doesn't really bother me as such and I like the original too...

Here are the two songs:



Dheere Dheere Se


Come into my life

Friday, February 22, 2013

Endurance


Physical pain becomes second nature once it crosses a limit. You just learn to live with it, it becomes like overgrown fingernails, they don't hamper your capability to work much but their presence is a mild irritant in the back of your mind.

Pain has been my constant companion for me since the time I can remember. It was physiotherapy and other such assorted treatments from a very young age, the excuse being 'don't you wish to be ok?' 'walk?' 'run?' 'play cricket?' etc. At other times it was ridicule, the louder I cried the vicious the ridicule. I can't say how much such treatments helped me physically but, it surely helped me in braving the pain silently and learning to ignore it all together. I became detached from my body so to speak (this isn't a high funda thing as it sounds but a practical thing that happens naturally, so, now I feel that my b***t has gone numb still I can go on typing this without much fuss).

Heartache or emotional hurt is a different matter. You can read lots of self-help and how-to books or follow any spiritual guru, but, when it comes you're left to your own devices. There is/was (I'm not sure) a streak of depression in me that would take me brink often, it could be anything, sometimes something that may seem absolutely silly.

In the last few days there were couple of instances that I feared (they weren't silly for me, not even in hindsight) would take me to the brink or at least it would take me a few days to be back to normal. But, to my surprise I was back to normal in just a few hours on both the occasions. And, to top it up I can think of those incidents without any uneasiness. I have also thought about how my brain was working during those hours to see if there was any peculiar pattern that was followed.

I'm getting a few answers from this process. The best of them maybe that my heart too learning to endure pain without hampering my capability to work, otherwise I couldn't have written this post.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Thoughts on a Special Day


Hold me tight.

Let the gloom pass.

We will survive together.

It'll be just a normal day as any other.

I know that for sure My Love.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Imperfection And Inaction


I hardly strive for perfection or do my best, I’ll do better next time is my mantra (as there is a sense of dissatisfaction gnawing somewhere deep within and never a fulfilment). It is the mental thing, I just can't discount my limitations when I imagine myself doing something, it is only when the actual work starts the limitations come to the fore stifling even my thinking or the thought process and leaving me inactive. Sometimes, I stop making effort to do it again (if the degree of disappointment is very high), otherwise I just do it the way I can and leave the rest (it is very difficult for me to get out of the 'self-pity' zone if I enter one and I harass a couple of dear ones, so I've to be careful I don't slip into it).

Basically I feel I've turned out to be a happy person. I don't feel I require any special conditioning to remain like that (some weird chemical composition in the brain maybe).

Once in a while I do get lucky and achieve near perfection as in the snap below:

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I clicked it sitting in an auto-rickshaw in a traffic jam. Since then I have tried hard to capture fancy number plates (to make a series). But, has never come this close.

Monday, February 04, 2013

Second visit to the Biennale

At the Aspinwall House.

In front of the work of Vivek Vilasini.

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With Sendhil

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With Raju
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Sendhil with a headless Raju
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Discussing about how to be in my frame with their heads intact
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All Smiles
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At Ease (before Raju got punctured carrying me to the first floor a few times)
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The Unholy Trinity
Details of the First Visit to the Biennale are here.